He nodded, “Bon.” He looked over at Ian briefly, ” Why do I feel like you’re upset with me?”“M’no’” He didnt really know if he was or not. Yes a few things he had been annoyed with but not really upset.
“Truthfully?”
“Aye. Truthfully I am no’ upset.”
“D’accord….I think I want to go home now. If that’s alright with you.”
94He nodded, “Bon.” He looked over at Ian briefly, ” Why do I feel like you’re upset with me?”“M’no’” He didnt really know if he was or not. Yes a few things he had been annoyed with but not really upset.
“Truthfully?”
94“Ian?” He looked up at his husband, his eyes lonely and sad. “Will you sit next to me?”
“O’course. We can stay as long as ye wan’ ” He told him, taking a seat beside him.
“Merci.” He leaned against the red head, “How are you feeling?”
“Hm? I feel fine love?” He rose an eyebrow “Why do ye ask?”
“I worry about you.”
Ian chuckled softly and kissed the top of his head “Thers nothin’ tae be worryin’ aboot”
“Ian. You just got out of the hospital” He sighed “I’m torn. I want to cuddle and kiss you because it always makes me feel better. Mais Jeanne….”
Ian bit back a sigh and sat up so the other was no longer leaning against him to make his decision easier. “I ‘ave pills I can take if I need ‘em”
He frowned, looking back at the river and away from Ian. “I don’t want you to need them.”
“Well I don’ righ’ now.”
He nodded, “Bon.” He looked over at Ian briefly, ” Why do I feel like you’re upset with me?”
94“Ian?” He looked up at his husband, his eyes lonely and sad. “Will you sit next to me?”
“O’course. We can stay as long as ye wan’ ” He told him, taking a seat beside him.
“Merci.” He leaned against the red head, “How are you feeling?”
“Hm? I feel fine love?” He rose an eyebrow “Why do ye ask?”
“I worry about you.”
Ian chuckled softly and kissed the top of his head “Thers nothin’ tae be worryin’ aboot”
“Ian. You just got out of the hospital” He sighed “I’m torn. I want to cuddle and kiss you because it always makes me feel better. Mais Jeanne….”
Ian bit back a sigh and sat up so the other was no longer leaning against him to make his decision easier. “I ‘ave pills I can take if I need ‘em”
He frowned, looking back at the river and away from Ian. “I don’t want you to need them.”
94“Ian?” He looked up at his husband, his eyes lonely and sad. “Will you sit next to me?”
“O’course. We can stay as long as ye wan’ ” He told him, taking a seat beside him.
“Merci.” He leaned against the red head, “How are you feeling?”
“Hm? I feel fine love?” He rose an eyebrow “Why do ye ask?”
“I worry about you.”
Ian chuckled softly and kissed the top of his head “Thers nothin’ tae be worryin’ aboot”
“Ian. You just got out of the hospital” He sighed I’m torn. I want to cuddle and kiss you because it always makes me feel better. Mais Jeanne….”
94“Ian?” He looked up at his husband, his eyes lonely and sad. “Will you sit next to me?”
“O’course. We can stay as long as ye wan’ ” He told him, taking a seat beside him.
“Merci.” He leaned against the red head, “How are you feeling?”
“Hm? I feel fine love?” He rose an eyebrow “Why do ye ask?”
“I worry about you.”
94“Ian?” He looked up at his husband, his eyes lonely and sad. “Will you sit next to me?”
“O’course. We can stay as long as ye wan’ ” He told him, taking a seat beside him.
“Merci.” He leaned against the red head, “How are you feeling?”
94Walking over to the spot his grip tightened even more, that old fear of being alone coming up once more. He sat down next to the rock, running his fingers that weren’t holding onto Ian along the name carved into it. “Salut ma Jeanne.”Ian shifted a little as he stood beside him. He was doing just what Lilli suggested and stayed silent, letting Francis do all the talking.
He bowed his head forward, breathing in deeply, already his eyes were watering, he spoke only in French to Jeanne. “I’ve brought an old friend with me this time. You remember Ian, the tall red head, don’t you? We’re married now. I know I can’t believe it either. He’s very good to me, I think you’d approve. Lilli and me….well she doesn’t love me like she used to, but we are still friends. I wish you could have been there for the wedding, it was beautiful. I worked so hard to make it perfect. I know it wasn’t the small ceremony you had always dreamed of. But it was the gorgeous over the top one I had always dreamed of. We’re even raising a little girl now, her names Matilda. And if she grows up to be anything like you then I’ll know I did a good job as a Pa-Papa.”
His voice broke at the end,taking a deep breath he let go of Ian’s hand to wipe at his eyes and the tears pouring from them. “I still miss you Jeanne. It’s still hard knowing it might be a thousand year before we are reunited in Heaven. If I even get to Heaven when I die, I stopped being sorry for my sins a long time ago. I know you’d be disappointed to see how much I’ve given up my faith. Life is hard, things have improved greatly these last few decades, but it just hasn’t been easy. If you were here I’m sure you’d smack me upside the head and say quite complaining.” He laughed, the sound dying off quickly, replaced by sniffles and quiet little sobs. “I’ll always love you Jeanne. I can’t thank you enough for everything you did for me. For France. And I’ll never be able to apologize enough for what we did to you.”
Ian remained silent next to Francis. Even if he thought Francis should have the privacy he stayed at his side and listened. Once Francis let go of his hand he shoved them in his pockets for now, just wanted to keep them busy fiddling with his pack of cigarettes. He would smoked but he had more respect then that and waited.
Francis sat, content to just sit there for the moment in silent. He had said what he wanted to say to her. He stared down into the surface of the water, letting the memories of the times he spent here with her wash over him, bringing a soft smile to his face.
The redhead didnt move from where he was standing. He knew Lilli suggested that he add a piece of his own but he didn’t feel like ruining the moment at all. Instead he took to admiring his surroundings
“Ian?” He looked up at his husband, his eyes lonely and sad. “Will you sit next to me?”
94
lilli-of-the-mountain replied to your post: “Yes! Yes, please, please do! I will make you something to eat for while I drive you there.”
“I promise, sweet Francois. Wash well, for we are getting a special treatment today and no unsightly dirt should ruin things.”“I promise there will be no unsightly dirt.” He ran back over to her to sneak a kiss on her cheek before going into the bathroom and closing the door. He turned on the shower and got in a few seconds later.
Lilli shook her head at him and let out a sigh, going downstairs to put on some beef broth that she froze and brought over, so that it would boil and she could make him a good hearty meal of beef and noodles to go with the bread she baked and brought with her, as well. It would be something that would stick with him all day and would be good for him.
He hummed to himself as he washed, trying to be quick but still do a good job. Once he was done he blow dried his hair and put on the clothes Lilli had picked out for him. He sniffed as he went down the stairs, “Beef et noodles?”
“Of course!” Lilli laughed brightly and poured a good amount into a thermos for him before writing a note to Ian, stating that the rest was for him and Matilda. After cutting a few slices of bread, she put those in a sandwich bag before passing both items to Francis. “Do not forget your spoon.” Which was also handed to him quickly. “Are you ready?”
“You’re not going to dump it on me are you?” He hadn’t noticed how hungry he was until he had the thermos in his hand, and the delicious smell all around him. The day before he hadn’t eaten at all, and now his stomach was growling. “Ah oui, I’m ready.”
4Walking over to the spot his grip tightened even more, that old fear of being alone coming up once more. He sat down next to the rock, running his fingers that weren’t holding onto Ian along the name carved into it. “Salut ma Jeanne.”Ian shifted a little as he stood beside him. He was doing just what Lilli suggested and stayed silent, letting Francis do all the talking.
He bowed his head forward, breathing in deeply, already his eyes were watering, he spoke only in French to Jeanne. “I’ve brought an old friend with me this time. You remember Ian, the tall red head, don’t you? We’re married now. I know I can’t believe it either. He’s very good to me, I think you’d approve. Lilli and me….well she doesn’t love me like she used to, but we are still friends. I wish you could have been there for the wedding, it was beautiful. I worked so hard to make it perfect. I know it wasn’t the small ceremony you had always dreamed of. But it was the gorgeous over the top one I had always dreamed of. We’re even raising a little girl now, her names Matilda. And if she grows up to be anything like you then I’ll know I did a good job as a Pa-Papa.”
His voice broke at the end,taking a deep breath he let go of Ian’s hand to wipe at his eyes and the tears pouring from them. “I still miss you Jeanne. It’s still hard knowing it might be a thousand year before we are reunited in Heaven. If I even get to Heaven when I die, I stopped being sorry for my sins a long time ago. I know you’d be disappointed to see how much I’ve given up my faith. Life is hard, things have improved greatly these last few decades, but it just hasn’t been easy. If you were here I’m sure you’d smack me upside the head and say quite complaining.” He laughed, the sound dying off quickly, replaced by sniffles and quiet little sobs. “I’ll always love you Jeanne. I can’t thank you enough for everything you did for me. For France. And I’ll never be able to apologize enough for what we did to you.”
Ian remained silent next to Francis. Even if he thought Francis should have the privacy he stayed at his side and listened. Once Francis let go of his hand he shoved them in his pockets for now, just wanted to keep them busy fiddling with his pack of cigarettes. He would smoked but he had more respect then that and waited.
Francis sat, content to just sit there for the moment in silent. He had said what he wanted to say to her. He stared down into the surface of the water, letting the memories of the times he spent here with her wash over him, bringing a soft smile to his face.
94
“I promise, sweet Francois. Wash well, for we are getting a special treatment today and no unsightly dirt should ruin things.”“I promise there will be no unsightly dirt.” He ran back over to her to sneak a kiss on her cheek before going into the bathroom and closing the door. He turned on the shower and got in a few seconds later.
Lilli shook her head at him and let out a sigh, going downstairs to put on some beef broth that she froze and brought over, so that it would boil and she could make him a good hearty meal of beef and noodles to go with the bread she baked and brought with her, as well. It would be something that would stick with him all day and would be good for him.
He hummed to himself as he washed, trying to be quick but still do a good job. Once he was done he blow dried his hair and put on the clothes Lilli had picked out for him. He sniffed as he went down the stairs, “Beef et noodles?”
4Walking over to the spot his grip tightened even more, that old fear of being alone coming up once more. He sat down next to the rock, running his fingers that weren’t holding onto Ian along the name carved into it. “Salut ma Jeanne.”Ian shifted a little as he stood beside him. He was doing just what Lilli suggested and stayed silent, letting Francis do all the talking.
He bowed his head forward, breathing in deeply, already his eyes were watering, he spoke only in French to Jeanne. “I’ve brought an old friend with me this time. You remember Ian, the tall red head, don’t you? We’re married now. I know I can’t believe it either. He’s very good to me, I think you’d approve. Lilli and me….well she doesn’t love me like she used to, but we are still friends. I wish you could have been there for the wedding, it was beautiful. I worked so hard to make it perfect. I know it wasn’t the small ceremony you had always dreamed of. But it was the gorgeous over the top one I had always dreamed of. We’re even raising a little girl now, her names Matilda. And if she grows up to be anything like you then I’ll know I did a good job as a Pa-Papa.”
His voice broke at the end,taking a deep breath he let go of Ian’s hand to wipe at his eyes and the tears pouring from them. “I still miss you Jeanne. It’s still hard knowing it might be a thousand year before we are reunited in Heaven. If I even get to Heaven when I die, I stopped being sorry for my sins a long time ago. I know you’d be disappointed to see how much I’ve given up my faith. Life is hard, things have improved greatly these last few decades, but it just hasn’t been easy. If you were here I’m sure you’d smack me upside the head and say quite complaining.” He laughed, the sound dying off quickly, replaced by sniffles and quiet little sobs. “I’ll always love you Jeanne. I can’t thank you enough for everything you did for me. For France. And I’ll never be able to apologize enough for what we did to you.”
94 lilli-of-the-mountain replied to your post: “Yes! Yes, please, please do! I will make you something to eat for while I drive you there.”
“I promise, sweet Francois. Wash well, for we are getting a special treatment today and no unsightly dirt should ruin things.”
“I promise there will be no unsightly dirt.” He ran back over to her to sneak a kiss on her cheek before going into the bathroom and closing the door. He turned on the shower and got in a few seconds later.
4“You just haven’t been saying anything.”“Ther really isnae much fer me tae say today.”
“Oh..d’accord.” He looked down at the path and the little flowers that grew along it.
“As I said Francis, don’ worry aboot it”
He remained silent for the rest of the walk, pausing a few feet away from the spot. There was a large rock he had painstakingly carved ‘Jeanne D’Arc’ into marking it. “We’re here.”
Ian nodded and gave him a little nudge forward, offering him a little bit of privacy if he wanted.
He held onto Ian’s hand even tighter, “Come with me? S’il te plait?”
He offered another nod. “O’course”
Walking over to the spot his grip tightened even more, that old fear of being alone coming up once more. He sat down next to the rock, running his fingers that weren’t holding onto Ian along the name carved into it. “Salut ma Jeanne.”
94